There is no such thing as a perfect person. Such a creature does not exist, save for in fairy tales. Even then, perfection is always an illusion cast on the unwary. Why is it so easy to be bamboozled into believing that there is indeed someone who will never let us down or hurt us, who knows every right answer to every problem? Because it is what we want to believe. We yearn for perfection in others, maybe because we seem so far from it to ourselves.
“I don’t want someone who makes the same mistakes I did.” Mistakes and bad choices will always be, so long as we remain human. We are fallible, flawed and susceptible to deception, greed, envy, and corruption of every kind. These vile “qualities” are engraved on the minds of every newborn babe. This engraving is why we must guard our hearts so carefully. I put “qualities” in quotes because lust, greed, malice, and deceit are not “qualities” at all. Traits maybe, not qualities. No, a person who can see mistakes for what they are, admit when they have done wrong, seek forgiveness and work hard to right their wrong instead of accepting it into their character, those are qualities obvious in a person of quality. Those are the people to keep close. The ones who do not see perfection or seek it, but who see their own flaws. Be strong in who you are, even be proud! But don’t be a fool, experiences are to learn from and grow. Pride in yourself is itself a blinder, so guard your heart from the world of dark. Its so very easy to get lost.
Looking for your “Happy ever after” will lead to disappointment and heartache IF your happy ever after is some prince charming [or princess charmaine 😉 ] you have placed high above everyone else on a mystical pedestal no one can touch. When we expect perfection in others, they fall harder than when we know they are just like us. Any mistake made by our Perfect destroys the image of them we had, breaking our heart. Understanding the Human in all of us is a gift. I do not want a pedestal to stand on. I want those important to me or to whom I am important to know I am broken and at times scared, confused, strong, weak, imperfect, fun, boring, and that I, just as they, have and will be mistaken sometimes. I want my brothers and sisters around me to see me for the creature of change I am. To know when I mess up, that I will admit it and move forward from there and not take pride in my fallacies. Do I have regrets? Some. Living without regret is a myth. Living with our choices, be they successes or mistakes is a whole other ball game. Some harder than others, but all forgivable when we genuinely ask forgiveness. I’m not even talking spiritually here (though God’s grace in forgiveness trumps all others) but here in my flesh is the capacity to really forgive. As long as I keep myself accountable for my actions and understand every one of my actions, good or bad, mistake or act of good, is a decision anyone else could have made.
Circumstances and temptations are just excuses we use to make the wrong choice.
I love the cheesy. Like, “Happiness is the journey, not the destination.” Its so very true though! Attitude is what every situation reflects. I want love to be my reflection. Real love that forgives when asked for forgiveness and love that doesn’t hold grudges for other’s mistakes that I easily could make with the right push in the wrong direction. Love that shows through me loving enough to tell you when I have been a fool, coming clean, and wanting to be a better man tomorrow than I am tonight even as I type through use of the knowledge of the past to create my happily ever after.
Thanks for reading!
Grace and Peace,
Andrew