Progress (take 2): Starting Over

Forewarning; these thoughts will jump around. Read on at your own risk…

Who has not had a day where your brain clicks and all the stuff you stuffed into the back corner of your mind explodes to the forefront? Your mood shifts like hurricane winds appearing from nowhere over the ocean. Suddenly you find yourself floundering without a life-preserver and its like you forgot how to swim. If only we would have some faith and stand up we would see we can walk on water.

If we are constantly starting from the beginning, we will not ever get anywhere. This can be in the job market where I have experienced it most, job-hopping as I call it. Starting over can be in relationships, which is usually a great step but if you continuously start over, you’ll find shallow experiences and no depth of character is being achieved. Learn from your experiences and get out of patterns of thought and decision making that lead to bad choices. Get out from under people who encourage you to make those bad choices or make the same decisions themselves.
We hear stuff like this our whole lives but most of us do not let in the wisdom of those who have experienced such  things before us. We as humans in the 21st century tend to have the mindset that says “im going to find out for myself” then our parents and grandparents sit back and watch as we crumble then come to them and say how wrong we were. I have been blessed that my family has never held grudges or been the “I told you so” kind of people that are poisonous. They just look at me and say, “I love you, you are my heart” and we move forward with new knowledge and a stronger sense of who is to be trusted, what pitfalls become chasms, and how to avoid them so we don’t end up right where we started with nothing to show for it but pain and loss.

I wish I had the words to say to convince everyone that God is real, that some people can be good people but if they live in sin it makes no difference because they will still pull you down, and i wish i had the right words to express just how deep real love goes and that false love can look just like it until something big goes down and you are left standing alone. The people who really love you will have their arms open waiting for you to grab onto them so they can pull you up from the bottom, or at least not let go while you walk through the shadow together.

This is the example, the standard Christ upholds and directs all of us who believe to follow .

There is a difference between living in sin and sinning as an action. Living in sin is seeing that whatever decision I am about to make is wrong and could potentially hurt me or others, doing it anyway, seeing it was poor judgement after its done, doing nothing to make up for it, then continuing on with the same line of thinking instead of repenting (turning away from) and making amends. Even if I didnt know it was sin or maybe was merely unwise before it happened, but when I did realize after the fact I was a fool after all and still did nothing to course correct my life, I would be living in it.

What is your reputation? Are you proud of it?

How others see my actions can say a great deal about the road I am rolling down. The way I see someone else’s actions should tell me a great deal about the road they are on and whether or not I want to continue on it also. We can warn someone about the danger ahead all day, but if they keep rolling, eventually we have to jump off or crash with them. Even being unsure and not knowing which road to take to get out of the path of danger will cause the collision because I never turned aside.

Some people crash then get back in the broken vehicle thinking they are moving on when they are really sitting on the tracks while another train is bearing down on them.

If I have cut friends out of my life who helped me make bad decisions yet find myself making the same mistakes over and over with each new group, then I have not made new friends, it is the same people with new faces.

Running from something for a long time will blind us and make everything seem scarier than if we just stop and turn around to face the fears which turn out to generally be far less terrifying than our imaginations lead us to believe. If my heart tells me to do something and I ignore it, my heart gets harder to hear over time. Eventually even when it screams at me I will be so comfortable closing the door to its voice that doing so becomes second nature and we easily brush it aside it at its loudest.

Certain happenings or events can wipe away the soundproofing we layer over our hearts so suddenly that all at once we hear everything we have shut out so long and we literally feel pulled or compelled to act on our heart’s direction but sometimes whatever distractions we have in place seem more like reality because its what we are used to and we dismiss the truth we felt because it frightened us enough to rebuild the barrier.

Truth makes us feel uncomfortable and even angry when we are hiding from it. Happens to me all the time! At least it used to until I embraced the uncomfortable.

I hope you embrace truth when you hear it, that you share yourself with people who love you and you love in return. I hope you really forgive and do not hold onto grudges or past hurts, they stifle and choke who you are and what you may be capable of and carve out the good possibilities into a shell of misery and you often become devoid of the ability to stand and prove your integrity even to yourself, or be who you want to see when you look in the mirror. Grudges prevent new life from forming and smother hope, replacing it with bitterness and fear. I hope that when you are scared of a roaring monster that you get up in its face and roar right back until the creature runs away from you, instead of the other way around.

If you are ever confused about where to go, pick a wise direction and start walking, you will know if you have made a wrong turning soon enough. Nothing is so big that God cannot fix it. But just like everything else, it is a choice.

No matter which way we face, we only progress in the direction we choose to walk.

To check out earlier writings on progress, click here:

Much love

Grace and Peace,



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